


The aftermath

by thestoriesthatiwrite



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-06
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-08-29 09:49:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8484724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thestoriesthatiwrite/pseuds/thestoriesthatiwrite
Summary: Since Skam is on hiatus till the 14th here's my every day fanfiction of what I think Isak is going through after the events of Episode 5. It'll cover all the 8 days until Skam comes back.





	1. Sunday 17:30

**Author's Note:**

> totally fictional!

“Isak?”

“Isak?”

“Isak!?” 2 knocks on the door. It’s not that Isak couldn’t hear Eskild, it’s just that he didn’t feel like saying anything back.

“Isak, I know you’re in there.” He sighed. “Noora and I just wanted to know if Even and you will be joining us for dinner..” It had sounded so innocent. And Isak couldn’t blame Eskild for jumping to the conclusion that Even was here with him, just like last week. Last week, when everything was wonderful and so, so great. And now…….  
  
He wanted to cry again, scream into his pillowcase, get wasted. Invent a time-machine and do it all over again,  only this time, this time he would not run into Even, cause he’d know better.

“Isak?”

“What?” He shouted harder than he meant to. He was getting fed up, couldn’t the world just leave him alone.

“Are you?”

“No. Now please leave.” He tried to say it more neutral, the last thing he wanted was to talk things through right now. What was there to talk through anyway… It had all been one big lie after all.

“Okay…..” Eskild responded. For a second Isak thought, he would ask more questions, but nothing happened. He pulled the covers over his head and tried really hard not think about Even, but every time he did, all he saw was him kissing her.

 


	2. Monday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> everything that happened on Monday from Text Messages to conversations.

**Monday 10.15 text message**

_Jonas:_

Dude, where are you?   
Are you okay?  
Why aren’t you at school?

 

**Monday 13:33 Text message**

_Emma:_

If you are staying at home because you think I outed you to the entire school, don’t.   
I’m **not** that girl.   


 

**Monday 15:30 Text message**

_Jonas:_

I know you read my message, why aren’t you replying?  
Is it your mum?   
What the hell is going on, Isak?   
I know something is going on with you.  
Just tell me already?  


 

**Monday 19:00 Text message**

_Jonas:_

I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?   
We can talk about it then.  
Madhi isn’t mad, nobody is mad.

 

*

 

 

**Monday 19:55**

“Isak?” A familiar voice said, “Isak.”

“What?” Isak replied hoarsely, his throat felt dry and come to think of it so did his eyes.

“Could you unlock the door please?” Noora asked gently. “If you’re sick, we should measure your temperature, make sure you don’t have a fever.” Isak wasn’t sick, he didn’t need measuring of any kind. His stomach ached though. When was the last time he had eaten? “Isak?” She sounded worried.

“I’m fine” He said absent-mindedly, as he pushed himself upwards scanning the room for something eatable. Not that he was hungry, he wasn’t hungry at all.

“If you’re fine, surely you can open the door, so I can verify that.” He should have seen that reply coming. He looked at his phone and saw Jonas had texted him again. He scanned through it, talk again tomorrow, yeah, maybe, if Isak felt like school tomorrow. After all school was where Even would be. He fell back onto his bed. “Isak?!”

“Just go away already! If I needed a mum, I would have gone home.” It was rude, he knew that. Noora was a sweet girl and nothing like his crazy mother, but he just wanted to shut out the world for a little longer.

“Fine, suit yourself. But if you die, don’t blame me.”

He wouldn’t. After all, he pretty much already felt dead and he blamed it all on Even. And he blamed himself for believing all the things he had said. He should have known good things don’t happen to him.

When had they ever.


	3. Tuesday

**Tuesday 16.02**

Isak wasn’t sure what time it was, he only got up to have some cereal in the morning after everyone had left and then went straight back to bed. He couldn’t go to school. Not yet. Jonas would be there, Emma would be there, and most importantly, Even would be there. So he had gotten back to bed.   
Was he still wearing the same clothes as Friday? Isak shrugged, it didn’t matter. He heard voices in the hallway and something was definitely happening to his door. He leaned up a bit.   
“What are you doing?” He asked. Were they seriously breaking into his room? What happened to respecting privacy? He looked at his phone. 5 new messages. 16.03. School would be out by now. Eskild would still be at work. “Noora!? If I want you in my room, I’ll open the door myself.” The door, however, unlocked and opened anyway. “Jonas?”

“Jesus, Isak! You really need to open a window.”

“What are you doing here?” Isak asked a little angrily. He didn’t recall inviting him over.

“I came to see if you were doing alright?” Jonas said casually as he looked around and opened a window. “Though seeing you in this state, I’d have to conclude you are most definitely not.” He sat down on the side of the bed. “What the fuck is going on Isak?” He sounded aggravated. “Seriously, you’ve been acting so strangely these past few weeks.” Isak couldn’t really look at him so he stared at the open window instead. What was he supposed to say? Jonas sighed. “Is it your mum? Is she acting up again?”

“No,” Isak  replied softly “She’s the same as always.”

“A bible verse per day then.” Jonas tried to joke. Isak would have laughed under any other circumstance but right now he was closer to crying over it. Jonas seemed to notice the absent smile or mockery though. “Your dad?”

“No, he’s fine. I think. Haven’t heard from him in a while.” True, last text message was from two weeks ago.

“So, no family related problems?” Jonas concluded. Isak shook his head. “Figured.” Isak looked up and faced him for the first time. “Don’t be surprised, asshole. I’m your best friend. I know what you are like when you have a family crisis and this, this is not it.” Yes, Jonas was his best friend, but he was a lousy best friend back. “So what is it.” He pointed around the room. “No offence, but you look horrible, you smell horrible and there are breadcrumbs all over the bed.” Isak looked down, indeed there were. He honestly hadn’t noticed.

“Yeah,” he fake smiled, “It is a bit of a mess.”

“Understatement of the year.” Jonas smiled at him. He was kind, Isak did not deserve that. Especially not from him. He hadn’t been very kind in return these last few weeks.

They were silent for a while before Isak sat up straight, “How did you feel after I told you Eva had cheated on you?” he mumbled.

“What does that have to do with anything, that was last year.” Jonas asked. “Did you kiss Eva? Is that what this is about? Is that why Emma was mad at you?”

“God, no.” Isak felt almost offended Jonas thought he would actually kiss Eva. As if. “I was just wondering how you felt, you never really told me.”

“Well, I was hurt. I guess.” The topic clearly made him uncomfortable. “Geez, Isak. You have an imagination, use it.” Isak looked back at the window, not responding. “It sucked.” He continued after a short silence. “Big time, but I got over it. I had you and my friends. It wasn’t the end of the world.”

“Not the end of the world.” Isak whispered. It certainly felt like the end of the world to him on Friday.

“Well, no. The world is still here Isak, see!” Jonas pointed at himself with a big smile. “Still here.”

“Yeah, still here.” Isak repeated. He wish he could smile like Jonas right now. But he simply couldn’t. He leaned further against the wall. “still here….”

Jonas ran his hand over his head and sighed. “Look, I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what is wrong with you. Like I’m starting to think I’m supposed to able to read your mind, but I simply can’t. I need a little more help here, man.” He pulled off his shoes and sat next to Isak on the bed. “Does your problem have anything to do with what we just talked about?”

Isak turned his face to the other side. “maybe.” He swallowed.

“So Emma kissed someone else?” He guessed. Isak shook his head. “You kissed someone else.” Isak didn’t know what do now. Say yes or lie and say no. Technically speaking he hadn’t kissed someone else, but last week when he was supposed to be with Emma, he did. But that was last week. When things were good. “So, who did you kiss?” Apparently Jonas took his silence as an answer.

“doesn’t matter.” Isak confessed. “It was all a stupid mistake anyway.”

“So, this kiss was so unimportant that you didn’t come to school, got into a fight with Madhi and according to Noora haven’t left your room all weekend.” Isak sighed. “Makes sense. Completely logical reaction, I mean, some would say overreacting, but not me.”

“Fuck off.” Isak wasn’t in the mood for this anymore.

“Then stop being a dick and just tell me. Clearly it was a big deal.”

Isak felt annoyed, really annoyed. “Fine. It was a big deal.” He just wasn’t annoyed at Jonas, yet he was taking it out on  him. “Happy now? I kissed someone, it was a big deal and they fucking lied and used me and now…..” He swallowed, he didn’t mean to say that. He felt a hint of tears forming behind his eyes. Don’t cry he thought, real men don’t cry in front of other men.

“And now…” Jonas was being very gentle, his tone soft, the look in his eyes concerned.

Isak took a deep breath. “Now, I feel like… I feel like my heart was ripped out of my chest….. stamped on…. And given back to me. Only it’s not the same, it’s broken and mended together with…. really shitty duct tape.”

“Duct tape?”

Isak, smiled a little, he wasn’t sure where the duct tape came from either. “Yeah…”

“I get it.” Jonas shrugged.

“You do?”

“Yeah sort of, but when Eva cheated on me, you were there. You made me laugh and distracted me with horrible videogames and terrible movies.”

“Hey, they were not that terrible!” Isak defended himself.

“Alright, they were not that terrible.” Jonas looked him over. “She must have gotten you real good.” Isak looked away again. “Who is she anyway? Any girl we know?”

“No.” Isak said, which wasn’t a lie. Not really.

“She kissed someone else, at that party on Friday.”

“Yeah.”

“Someone you know?” he asked. “We could get the gang, beat him up.”

“No, no. That is not necessary. It wasn’t the other’s fault anyway.”

“Okay, but it’s not like we can beat up chicks. That’s not a line I’m crossing. Even bitches we can’t hit.”

“Oh, no same here. You do not hit girls.” Isak would never hit Sonja. Now Even he would given the chance, though probably not. He’s not much of a fighter to begin with.

“So what is this heartbreaker like?”

“I don’t really want to talk about it.”

“Jesus Isak. Come on, if you can’t tell your best friend anything, what the point in having them?”

Isak sighed. He lowkey wanted to push Jonas out of the room now and work on that time-machine idea some more. He sighed again, touched his lips, fixed his hair. And took a beep breath. “You already know.”

“So, it is someone we know. Can’t be Vilde, you said it wasn’t Eva. Noora wasn’t here when you started to act weirdly. Is it Sana? Ingrid?”

“No.”

“Chris?”

“Why would I kiss Chris?”

“Good point, but I’m running out of names.” Jonas looked at Isak, who still wasn’t looking at him, but instead had a rather fixed glare on his hands. “Is she in our year?”

“No.”

“I don’t really know any first years, other than Emma. And I don’t even really know her. So it’s a third year.”

“Yeah.”

“Have I snogged her?”

That question got a big response from Isak. “No, No, No.” He pulled a face as if the idea itself was something disgusting.

“Okay, so definitely no.” Jonas look at him again. “Are you really going to make me guess it, Isak? I mean you have got to kidding me, be a man and just say it. Stop being such a girl about it.”

“And what if I want to be a girl about it.” Isak said slightly offended somehow.

“Well then, say it already. Girls talk about everything, all the time. Just in more detail.” Jonas sighed in frustration, “Look whoever it is, I will still be your friend after you tell me. I promise.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

“I will keep it.”

Isak bit his lip and looked at hands again. “You remember the guy that brought over my cap, well your cap.”

“Yeah, the new guy in the third year. Even, I think.”

“Yeah.”

“She kissed him? Even is the other guy? Dude, we can totally take him.”

He was totally jumping to the wrong conclusions. “Jonas..” Isak looked at him. “I kissed him. I kissed Even.”

“Oh.” Jonas mouth was slightly ajar and he was clearly figuring out what to say next. “Okay. And you’re upset because you might be gay, which - ”

“No…” He interrupted.

“Right, ‘cause your heart is broken. Why would it be broken if you were upset about being gay.” Jonas reasoned. “Which is totally cool by the way. I am cool with the gay.” Isak just stared at him.

“You’re freaked.” Isak wanted to run away, but this was his room.

“No.” He said defensive, then in a softer tone “No, I’m not freaked. I just wish you had told me sooner.”

“Sorry.” Isak looked at his friend and realised he really wasn’t freaked. He was just sitting there next to  him. “I just didn’t want you to think of me differently.”

“The way I see it, you are still Isak. You just like boys. But liking boys is just a very small part of who you are. You still have terrible taste in music, copy my math homework in exchange for your biology. Nothing’s changed all that much really.”

“I guess not”

“So……Wanna fill me in on everything, ‘cause if I have to do the guessing game again, I’m probably just going to say a lot of really dumb, offensive things, and I’d rather avoid that.”

Isak looked at his hands again. “Promise you won’t tell anyone else.”

“Of course. I promise.”

 

**Tuesday 17.15**

“Hey, look who finally came out of his room.” Eskild smiled brightly. He walked towards Isak and gave him a hug. “Hun, you need a shower.” He said, wrinkling his nose.

“He knows.” Jonas replied. “But food first, I cannot take his growling stomach anymore.”

Isak smiled. Noora opened up a can of beans, “Food, coming up.”  

“I’m sorry for my behaviour these last few days” Isak said as he sat down.

“That’s okay, we’ve all been there.” Eskild replied.

“You were eavesdropping?” Isak feigned surprise.

“Obviously.” Eskild and Noora smiled unapologetically.

“After the showers, I’m taking him to the movies. I owe him a terrible one and I have found the perfect film playing at 8.” Jonas smiled at Isak and he smiled back.

Jonas was right, the world hadn’t come to an end. He was still here, all of them were.

 


	4. Wednesday

**Wednesday 8:06**

“Isak, don’t forget your lunch?!” Noora was shouting from the kitchen.

“I haven’t.” Isak walked in. He wanted to look nonchalant today. So he went with his blue, woollen hat and a grey hoodie with a plain white shirt.

The doorbell rang. “Could you get the door?”

“Sure.” Isak walked down the hallway and slid the door of its lock.

“Good morning.” Jonas replied when the door had opened.

“What are you doing here?”

“Making sure you go to school as promised instead of spending another day hiding in your room.”

“Noora’s already making that pretty impossible.”

“Good, everyone ready?” Noora pulled on her coat.

“Ready.” Jonas replied.

“Now, if you see Even, just pretend he doesn’t exist and walk straight past him. No looking, no talking. Just ignore him.”

“Even who?” Isak replied simply.

“That’s the spirit.” Jonas laughed and slapped him on the shoulder.

“Now, just so I have it all correct. Emma, Noora and I are the only ones that know, right?”

“Well… and Even.” Noora added.

“Even doesn’t know, someone that doesn’t exist cannot know things.” Isak stated firmly.

“True.” Noora beamed. “Oh, and Eva knows.”

“Eva?” both Isak and Jonas asked shockingly.

“We found gay porn on your phone last year.” Noora explained awkwardly.

“You have gay porn on your phone?”

“So what, all guys watch porn, don’t they?” Noora saved Isak from having to answer that. She wasn’t wrong, so why did he feel ashamed for having been caught when all the guys he knew had porn on their phones too.

“Well, yeah.” Jonas said, “I guess that is true.”

“I honestly don’t understand. The Porn Industry is a horrible industry and - ”

“Look at the time.” Isak interrupted. “we really must be off.”

“We must indeed, coming late is a horrible thing to do.” Jonas and him quickly opened the door and walked through it.

“Oi, wait for me.”

 

 

**Wednesday 12:11 text message**

_Vilde:_  
Kose group meeting coming Friday,   
7PM School theatre.

 

**Wednesday 14.23**

“Vilde is just overreacting. It’s already fixed anyway.” Isak explained. “Didn’t think you’d be one to care?”

“I don’t.” Sana confirmed. “You just never struck me as the violent type.”

“And what type of guy do I strike you as?”

“Someone more….” Isak was half expecting her to say gay, or feminine. “more passive-aggressive.”

“Oh.”

“It’s good things got solved. The last thing Vilde would want is for anyone to drag their drama into the Kose group.”

Isak ran his hand through his hair. “Yeah, about that….” He started, “I won’t be there on Friday.”

“What!?” Sana looked at him sternly. “And the excuse would be...”

“No excuse. I just already made plans with Jonas.”

“Right?”

“No, I have.” Isak defended, “I’ve sort of been neglecting him and I promised to hang out with him.”

“Okay.” Sana’s answer surprised him. Just a simple okay. He smiled, a Kose group meeting was the last place he wanted to be. “So….” He closed his eyes waiting for what would follow. “why have you been neglecting Jonas?”

“ehu…” Isak stammered “well, see…. That’s because…. ehum”

“You’ve been spending all your time with Emma?” Isak looked at her. “I saw you talk to her at the party, she didn’t seem happy with you.”

“She wasn’t.”

“Maybe it’s a good thing then that you have ‘plans’ on Friday.”

“Trust me. It is.” Isak confessed, “If I didn’t have them already, I’d be making them now.”


	5. Thursday

**Thursday 14.10**

Standing on the school steps, Isak looked around. He shouldn’t, but he couldn’t help himself, he was looking for Even. It was like he had no free will of his own. He hadn’t seen him all day, though that might have been because Jonas and Noora had dragged him to the weirdest places. They even had Lunch on the floor in front of the girls’ locker room. Isak knew Even was at school and his day on Thursday ended with Biology about 10 minutes ago. He did spot Emma though, talking to her friends. Apparently they were throwing another party after the meeting tomorrow. He shook his head, he didn’t want to think about those kind of parties anymore.   
Emma’s friends had left her alone just outside the gates. He decided that he should probably talk to her.

“Hello.” She said once she noticed him, there was no smile, but no malice in her voice either.

“Hi.” Isak responded back, followed by an awkward silence. “I just wanted to thank you for not saying anything.”

“Whatever. It’s not my secret to tell.”

Isak bit his lip “I’m sorry for leading you on. I shouldn’t have done that. You have every right to be mad at me.”

“I know. I still am.” Isak couldn’t blame her.

“I’m an asshole.”

“Yes, you are.” Emma confirmed, “Nobody cares if you’re gay these days.”

“Tell that to my mother.” Isak responded. He didn’t mean to say it, it just came out.

Emma looked at him. “She doesn’t approve?”

“Pretty sure.”

“Is that why you live in the dorms?”

“Amongst other reasons.” He owed her bit of the truth, he reckoned. “Hey, did Even tell you?”

“Even? No, Sonja did.”

“Oh.” Of course she did, Isak thought.

“She thought I had a right to know.” Isak didn’t really know what to say to that. “She said that Even told her you were gay.”

So at least that part wasn’t a lie, Isak realised. Even had told her about him in some ways. “What else did she say?”

“Nothing. That was it.”

“She didn’t tell you anything else?”

“No, should she have?”

Isak snickered. “No. I’m sure Even just told her what was convenient. Asshole.”

“Asshole? Even?” Emma seemed offended. “For what, telling his girlfriend and her telling me?”

“What?” Isak was starting to get mad. How was Even the good guy in any of this. “Even is an asshole. The sooner you realise this, the better off you’ll be. Trust me.”

“You’re seriously mad he told her?”

Okay, Isak was so not getting into this, especially not with Emma. “You know what? Whatever! Have fun tomorrow at the Kose Group. I won’t be there.”

He started to walk away, “Hey! Don’t walk away from me. I didn’t do anything wrong. You don’t get to be mad at me, or take it out on me.” She shouted at him.

Isak sighed, true. He turned around. “You’re right.”

She caught up to him “Then stop being such a dick.”

“Sorry.”

“Look, Even would never tell anyone else either and neither would Sonja.”

“Obviously.” Isak stated.

“And if you didn’t want anyone to know, why tell Even in the first place?” Isak didn’t answer her. “I mean, that makes no sense. Unless you confessed to him or something. Did you?” He stared at his feet, he hadn’t confessed, not really. It’s not like he had ever said to Even, ‘I like you’ or ‘I think I might be falling in love with you’.

“No,” he answered. “Look, I just wanted to apologize. Not have a heart to heart conversation about Even and me.”

“Even and you?” Emma repeated “There is an Even and you?”

“Like I said. Not having a heart to heart conversation.” Isak replied. He was trying to stay nice. “Got to go.” He turned around and made way to the bus stop. She didn’t follow him. He was glad.

 

 

**Thursday 14.30 text message**

_Emma_

When you said Even and you, did you mean as in together?

Did you?

Is that why Even is an Asshole? Why you got mad at my party? He told on you, but not on himself?

Is Even gay too?

 

**Thursday 16.03 text message**

_Emma_

Hello????!!!! Isak!   


 

**Thursday 19.04 text message**

_Even_

Just got a text from Emma.   
She wanted to know why I told Sonja about you.   
I’m sorry Sonja told her you were gay btw, that was never part of the plan.   
I didn’t know until just now, she had no right to.   
Hope everything is alright. Haven’t seen you school. Looked for you today.

I miss you.

 

 

**Thursday 19.15**

“Unbelievable.” Noora exclaimed. “The nerve. The fucking nerve!”

“I miss you.” Eskild read outloud. “Well maybe you shouldn’t have stuck your tongue down your girlfriend’s throat.” He looked confused. “Well, okay. Maybe he shouldn’t be a two-timing bitch.”

“Well, I think it’s safe to say he didn’t know you saw him at the party.” Noora said.

“Or he is really, really dumb.” Eskild added. He looked at Isak. “Isak?” Isak looked up. “You okay?”

“Yeah. I just…. I don’t really know what to do now.”

“Well, You should tell him that he’s an asshole and not to bother you ever again.” Noora was already typing on his phone.

Isak quickly took it. “We’re ignoring him, remember. He doesn’t exist.”

“Well, that was until he sent this message.” She said, trying to get his phone back.

“See, people like him give bisexuals a bad name.” Eskild shook his head. “They can’t be pleased with just a girl, so they need a boy on the side. And the rest of them suffer the consequences.”

Isak looked confused. “What consequences?”

“Biphobia” Eskild said, stating the obvious. “Do you know how many gay and straight people don’t want to date bisexuals because of that very reason?”

“Do you?” Isak asked.

“Well not the exact number, but trust me, it’s a lot.”

“You have to send him something back. Stand up for yourself. We don’t let men walk all over us in this dorm.” Noora was right. He should stand up for himself. Give Even a piece of his mind. He just didn’t know what to say.

Isak sighed. “Alright. But I need some time to think about what it is I’m going to tell him.”

“Well don’t take too long.” Noora said.

“And I want to read it.”Eskild added with a smile. “I might have some suggestion to make it better.”

“Later.” Isak got up from the couch and went to his room,. He fell back on the bed and reread Even’s message again.

_I miss you._

He missed Even too, and that, that he really hated.  

 

**Thursday 22:01 text message**

_Isak to Emma_

Sorry, I’ll explain everything later. I’m an ass, I know.  
Maybe we can meet up at school tomorrow.  

 

**Thursday 23:55**

Isak stared at his phone.

_You’re an asshole and I hate you._ He typed in, but then removed it again. Maybe he would just ignore him. He was after all the passive-aggressive type.

_I miss you_

“Fuck” what was he supposed to do with that. He threw his phone on the floor and the covers over his head.


	6. Friday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also includes Saturday early morning hours

**Friday 8:14**

Isak was waiting patiently at the tram stop. It was running a little late, but he should still be able to make it to class on time.   
The tram arrived and Isak got in.   
“Hello.” A familiar voice said. He looked up and looked straight at Even. He was smiling at him.   
Even was here.   
Right here.   
Mere steps away from him.   
Smiling.   
Smiling at him.   
Even.   
Isak’s feet seemed to have a will of their own as he turned around and got off the Tram again; mere seconds before the door shut.   
“Fuck!” Isak cursed. So much for standing up for yourself. He just fled the scene as if he was a criminal and the cops had arrived.   
His phone rang. Even was calling him. Obviously. Isak sat down on a wooden bench nearby. What now? He wasn’t picking up, that was for sure. He wasn’t even sure he wanted to take the next tram to school. Could he avoid Even all day? Especially now that Even would actively be looking for him. Probably not.   
His phone buzzed.

 

_Even:_

Are you mad at me, if so maybe we should talk about it?  
Instead of you running out of a tram.   
Meet me during the break? Locker room?   
We’ll talk.

 

Okay, so Isak was definitely not going to school. He would just stay home today. No biggie. He’ll just tell the school nurse he had a relapse of the cold.

 

_Isak to Jonas:_

Staying home today.  
See you later.  
I’ll Bring the Booze ^^

 

 

**Friday 14.44**

“Alright. Let’s start with American Pie 1 and just watch them all.” Jonas sat down next to Isak on the couch.

“Seriously?”

“It’s ‘horrible movies’ payback time.” Jonas smirked.

“You are evil.” Isak stated. “Truly evil.”

“No, truly evil would be ordering an onion filled pizza for dinner and only having red wine to drink.”

Isak laughed. “Good thing, I was in charge of the drinks then.” He took another sip from his beer.

“Yeah, it does come in handy that you live with someone over the age of 18.”

“Okay,” Isak pointed at the tv. “I’m ready for my punishment.”

Jonas laughed. “Don’t turn me into some Bdsm Master! Let’s leave those kinks to Magnus.”

“Seriously though, Vilde in leather. Where does his head go?” Isak laughed.

“It’s a dark place man, a dark place.” Jonas grinned as he pressed the play button.

 

 

**Friday 23:02 text message**

_Eskild:_

Even just dropped by to see you.   
Told him you weren’t home.  
I didn’t tell him where you are though, in case he turns full stalker mode.  
Just kidding. But I didn’t tell him.   


 

**Saturday 3:15**

Isak had decided on going home. He was pretty sure if he stayed Jonas would just pull out another movie. And honestly Isak had suffered enough. He turned the key of the front door, walked through and noticed all the lights were off. Everyone must be in bed already. When he took a left turn, he saw a stream of light coming from his own room.   
Was Eskild in his room again? He opened the door, slightly annoyed at the prospect of having to see Eskild. He didn’t want to talk about Even, not this early in the morning.   
“Hey.”

“Even?” Isak said startled. “What are you doing here?”

Even got up from his bed and walked towards him. “Your dormmate let me in.”

“Eskild?” Isak said surprised.

“No, one of the girls. I hadn’t seen her before. She doesn’t go to our school I think.”

“Linn.” Isak shook his head. Linn stayed in her room most of the time. She would not have been aware that Even was unwanted in this house.  “Please, leave.” Isak said forcefully.

“You think I’m going to leave after waiting for you for 4 hours.” Even scoffed. “I looked for you at the party but you weren’t there.”

“I didn’t want to be there.” Isak said.

“Look. I really didn’t know Sonja had told Emma until I got that message. And I confronted Sonja about it.” Even started explaining. Isak wasn’t interested. He didn’t care why Sonja had told Emma, that Even wasn’t happy about it.

“Stop it!” Isak shouted. “Just go away!” Even looked at him surprised and a little hurt. Good, Isak thought. “I don’t want you here. I don’t want you here ever again!”

Even looked at him. “Is it because I said I needed time?” Why was Even so calm, for fuck sakes! His heart was pounding in his chest. “’cause I get that, but I was sort of hoping you’d understand.”

“Understand what?” Isak questioned “That you tell me you want to stay here with me forever, that you and Sonja are on a break, because you told her about me. And a day later you need time and you’re snogging her at that stupid party. How the fuck am I supposed to understand that, Even?”

Even sighed. “Isak?”

“Don’t come any closer.” Isak warned him when Even tried to approach him. “I mean it!”

“Sonja wanted to keep up appearances. A lot of our friends were there.” Isak shrugged, what stupid excuse was that. “I only agreed to it, because Emma had said you wouldn’t be there. That you had other plans.”

“Oh I’m sorry. You’re right this is all my fault. I showed up anyway.” Isak mocked.

“Isak….” Isak look at the window, he didn’t want to look at Even. His heart was still on full speed and it was getting harder for him to control his desire to break down and cry again. “Listen to me, I never meant to hurt you, honestly. Hurting you is the last thing I wanted to do an -”

“Well you did!” Isak exclaimed. “You did, so please just leave.”

“Isak?”

“If you don’t want to hurt me, then you’ll leave. ‘Cause right now, you being here hurts me.” Shit, He felt a tear run down his cheek and quickly turned around. “Please, just leave already!”

He heard Even’s footsteps, maybe he really would leave. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened them Even was standing in front of him. Isak couldn’t look away. The look in Even’s eyes made that impossible. “I’m sorry.” He said earnestly. As he ran his fingers over his cheek to wipe away some fallen tears. “I’m so sorry.” Isak wanted to cry. He wanted to scream, but he was frozen on the spot instead. “You know, you really turned my world upside down and that scared me.”

Isak was finally able to look away. “Scared you?” He spoke softly. “How?”

“What do you think.., I’ve only known you for 5 weeks and now I’m on a break from a 4 year relationship because I have such strong feelings for you that I can’t escape them.” Isak wiped a tear away from cheek. “You scare me, Isak. My feelings for you scare me. I don’t even really know you and just last week I never wanted to be parted from you. I wanted to spend every moment of every day with you.”

“And now?” Isak looked at him.

“I still don’t want to be parted from you.” Even confessed. Isak’s heart skipped a beat. “I really, really like you. It’s all just a little overwhelming. ”

“You just like Sonja more.” Isak mumbled.

“Are you even listening to me?” He raised his voice a bit. “I told her about you, because I want to figure out what we could be, what we could have. You really think, I would have done that if I liked Sonja more. Risk my relationship with her?” Even reasoned. “Isak, when I say I need time, I didn’t mean it was over... It’s just going too fast, I can hardly think straight.”

“So, what do you want from me then?” Isak asked.

“Well, to forgive me for starters. And I want to get to know you. Like your past and your ideas for the future. I want to figure out if we fit, don’t you?”

Isak looked him in the eyes and nodded “I want to know more about you too.”

Even smiled, he looked relieved. “And I will tell you everything you want to know.”

“What if we don’t fit?” Isak wondered.

“Then we will have had a few wonderful weeks together, but we both know that that is all it was.”

Even made it sound like they were going to take a test together. “It’s not that simple though, is it? You don’t stop loving someone just because you don’t fit together.”

“True. But can you be happy in a relationship where you’re too different to agree on the most important things in life?”

“No.” Isak knew that for sure. Even took Isak’s head in his hands and ran his fingers through his hair.

“So, do you forgive me?”

“Well….” Isak looked at his lips, he couldn’t help it. “I might need some time.” He smirked a little.

“I can live with that.” Isak looked upwards into Even’s eyes. “Can I kiss you?” He asked. “I really, really want to kiss you.” Isak honestly didn’t know what to think. He wanted to kiss Even. But he wasn’t sure he should give in so easily. Even had explained it all, and Isak sort of understood. Sort of, not entirely. And it was that part which he didn’t quite get that made him feel hesitant.

Isak gently pulled Even’s hands off his face. “I’m tired.” He said. Even looked hurt and he hated that.

“Okay, I’ll leave.” Even picked up his coat.

“Stay.” Isak whispered on impulse. Even didn’t say anything. He put his coat back on the chair and pulled off his shoes. Isak took of his hoodie. He felt very self-conscientious having Even watch him. He had seen him in his boxers before but that was different somehow. Isak pulled of his shirt, back towards Even and undid his pants before he hopped underneath the covers. It was his turn to watch. Even just stood there. What was he waiting for? Isak sighed. “Or go…” he looked up at the ceiling.

“Do you want me to?”

“If you want to go, you should go.” Isak reasoned, feigning indifference.

“and if I want to stay?”

“Then stay, but I really need some sleep.” Isak turned to his side, face towards the wall. He couldn’t deal with Even’s sudden indecisiveness anymore. He heard footsteps come towards the bed and the bed tilt slightly. He held his breath a little, heart beating just a little faster.

“You’re pretty when you sleep.” Even whispered. “You’re pretty when you’re awake.”

Isak turned around and looked at him. Even was sitting on the bed, back against the wall. “Can’t say the same about you. You don’t sleep apparently.” He yawned.

Even laughed quietly and pushed himself off the wall to lie next to him on the sheets. “You hog the covers.”

Isak noticed he indeed did. “I like the warmth.” He simply stated unapologetically.

“I’m warm.” Even claimed. Isak felt his cheeks burn a little.

“Well, I would be too, if I had my clothes on in bed,” That sounded wrong.

Even laughed. And pulled of his sweater. “Understood.” He winked. Isak didn’t stop him as he removed his jeans. “This too?” he smirked putting a finger underneath his boxers.

“No.” Isak replied quickly to which Even just laughed more. He could listen to that sound forever.

“Will you now, share your cover with me?” Even teased.

Isak looked at him, “I’ll think about it.”

He felt Even give him a soft push. “Come on. I’m freezing now.”

Isak lifted his covers and Even got underneath them. “Liar.” Isak whispered. “You’re still warm.” Even ran his hand through his hair and pulled him closer. His face buried into Even’s chest. He was wrong before. It wasn’t Even’s laughter he could listen forever. It was his heartbeat.


	7. Saturday

**Saturday 11.44**

Isak woke up with an arm around his waist and soft, even breaths in his neck. He couldn’t help but smile. He tried to turn over as gently as possible, it was his turn to watch Even sleep.   
Even had told him he was hot and pretty when he slept. Isak studied him, as if he was trying to engrave every piece of his face into his mind from his long eyelashes to the way the corner of his mouth was curved into a little smile. Even, Isak concluded, was absolutely beautiful. He was almost temped to take a picture with his phone. Should he? Would Even mind? Or had he done the same when he had been sleeping and just never told him?   
Isak shook his head, maybe some other time, when they were a definite fit. He snuggled back in the warmth of Even’s arms. If this were to be temporary, he’d make the most of it for sure. But, Isak, wondered, can you truly fall in love with someone when you know they can leave you at any given time? On which grounds did Even expect them to clash to begin with? And if he wanted to hold on to Even which lies would he have tell?

**Saturday 13:30**

Isak bolted up in bed at the sound of his phone, heart beating fast by the rude awaking.   
“Turn it off.” Even mumbled beside him.   
“I would if I could find it.” Isak responded, having left the warmth of the bed to be met by the very cold air in the room. He found the phone in the left pocket of his Jeans. _One missed Call. Magnus._ The boys probably wanted to hang out tonight, go to a party or something.

“Who was it?” Even yawned.

“Magnus.” Isak picked up his shirt and pulled it over his head. “Probably wants to make plans for tonight.”

Even nodded and leaned on his elbows. “Come here.” He beckoned. Isak obeyed and sat on the bed next to him.

“You want to get some breakfast?” He asked.

“Sure. You want to eat out?” Even smiled. “I know this great little bakery just 10 minutes from here.”

Isak couldn’t help but be happy. “Kind of sounds like a date to me.” He mumbled.

“So?” Even wondered.

“Nothing. I’ve just never gone on a date before.” He answered honestly.

“Never?”

“No, I’ve never had anyone to go on a date with. Not one-on-one anyway.” Isak felt very self-conscience. Was this one of those thing where they wouldn’t fit? Isak’s lack of experience. He only dated girls, but he never took them anywhere without chaperons aka his friends. That way it could never get to intimate or personal. “Does this make me undate-able?” He quietly asked.

Even laughed “No. No, not at all. It just means, I’d better be impressive today.”

“Why?” Isak looked at him puzzled, “It’s not like I have anything to compare it with.”

“That is true. But if it makes you feel better I’ve never gone on a date with a guy either.” Even confessed. “It’s kind of exiting, right?”

Isak admired Even for finding it exiting, he mostly just found it nerve-wrecking. “Right…” He tried to smile. “Shall we go then?”

“Not just yet.” Even lifted himself up more, placed a hand behind Isak’s neck and gave him a soft kiss on the lips. “Good morning, Isak.” He smiled.

He felt like a teenage girl, butterfly in his stomach, trying not to grin too much. “Good morning.” He said a little flushered.

“You’re adorable.” Even concluded. “You really, really are adorable.”

 

**Saturday 14:30**

They were standing in front of a small bakery at the corner of the street. “Let’s go.” Even grabbed his hand and tugged him inside. The bakery was minimalistic. Simple couches and tables. Glass counter. And big black lamps above the tables. Not what Isak had imagined. Most bakeries he knew looked more old fashioned, cosy, like they were made in the early 50. Even walked them to a table in the left corner by the window. Isak sat down and looked outside, suddenly very aware that he was at a bakery with Even, a boy. What would people think if they saw him? What if someone he knew walked into this bakery? He felt a little panicked. He didn’t want people to look at him and be disgusted. He didn’t want the world to know about him and Even. Or about his feelings for boys to begin with. He must have given something away because he felt the other boy squeeze his hand. “Want to move upstairs?”

Isak just nodded. How could Even be so understanding? This was their first date and he was blowing it big time because of his stupid fear anyone might see them.  “Isn’t upstairs closed?”

Even shrugged. “Not anymore.” He got up, undid the chain in front of the stairs and went up. Isak looked around him, but nobody seemed to care. He quickly followed him.

“Are you sure this is okay?”

“Yeah, my aunt runs this place.” Even explained as he sat down at one of the tables.

“Like your aunt owned the swimming pool?”

Even laughed. “No, this is actually true. I can’t believe you bought that though.”

“Yeah well… I can’t believe you lied about that.”

He heard footsteps on the stairs and turned around. A woman with blond hair pulled back in a ponytail stood in front of them. “Aunt Marie, This is Isak. Isak meet my Aunt Marie.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” Isak smiled.

“You couldn’t have stayed downstairs?” She asked Even sternly.

“We needed more privacy.”

“Fine,” she sighted, “Know what you will be having?”

“I’ll have an expresso and a grilled cheese panini.” Even decided. “Isak?”

“Ehum…” He hadn’t even looked at the menu. “Okay, same thing.” He didn’t want to fuck this date up any more than he already had.

“Coming up.”

He watched her go downstairs and turned to Even. “She seems nice.” He said.

“She’s okay.” Even said.

Isak said down. “I’m sorry I made you move.” He looked at his hands.

“That’s okay, I understand. You’re not out yet.” Even took one of Isak’s hands in his. “It’s good though, now I can do this and not get busted by my Aunt.” He lifted Isak’s chin and kissed him. It was longer than this morning and Isak could feel a tongue brush his lips. He places his hand behind Even’s neck and gave in. Maybe this would be a good first date after all.


	8. Sunday

**Sunday 12:30**

“Morning” Eskild greeted him in the kitchen.

“It’s noon.” Noora pointed out.

“Yeah, Well…I needed to catch up on some sleep. Since I didn’t get much on Saturday.” Eskild winked at Isak. “Next time speak a little louder, so I can hear the entire conversation, instead of bits and pieces.”

“What did I miss?” Noora asked curiously.

“Even came over early Saturday morning.” Eskild filled her in.

“What? No! Oh my god.” Noora was genuinely surprised. “Did you guys talk it out?”

“Yeah, we talked.” Isak answered. “He explained what happened and why…”

“And you gave him a piece of your mind?” Noora wondered.

Had he? “I think so. I…I told him how I felt.” Isak responded.

“Yes you did.” Isak felt a little uncomfortable that Eskild had overheard him, “But it all worked out since I saw them snuck out of the house in the afternoon.” Eskild confessed, “Where did you go?”

“Out for breakfast, like on a date.”

“Isak!!” Eskild gave him a hug. “I’m so proud of you, your very first boy on boy date.”

“You’re embarrassing him.”

“We’re trying to figure out if we fit.” Isak mumbled.

“That is the purpose of dating.”Noora stated, “getting to know each other. But even when you think you fit, sometimes in the end you just don’t.”

“True. I mean people get married and divorced all the time. Sometimes a fit is just temporary.” Eskild and Noora made good points. What if he and Even were a fit but then after a few years they would grow apart, like Even did with Sonja. How would he know in 5 years from now, Even wouldn’t be telling him about someone he just met? “The thing is to enjoy a fit while it lasts, finding love in the first place isn’t that easy to begin with.”

“But how can you let yourself fall head over heels in love with someone if you don’t plan for it to be forever?”

“Because you can’t control feelings, Isak. They just happen. The only thing you get to decide is what to do with them.” Noora explained. Even had said something similar. How he couldn’t control it and it scared him. Isak wasn’t as scared of falling in love with Even as he was of losing him. That he wouldn’t be good enough in the end. He had enough disappointments to last him a lifetime already.

“Look, falling in love with someone is a scary thing, but if you don’t want to spend the rest of your life alone, it’s a risk you will have to take at some point.  You’ll have to accept that you are giving your heart to someone else and just hope they don’t give it back to you. That they either keep it forever and cherish it or that you’re the one taking it back.” Eskild sat down and took a sip of coffee. “That’s all there’s to it.”

“It’s different though, for Even and I, I mean.” Isak said. “He still has Sonja. He’s literally deciding who he wants to be with… whereas I only have him.”

Noora looked at him and sighed. “Then I guess, you will have to fight for him. If you want Even to pick you, you have to make him see what a wonderful person you are. That all the Sonja’s in the world don’t have anything on you.”

“And believe you are a wonderful person yourself.”Eskild added looking straight at him. “If you can’t be proud of who you are, how can you be proud about what you have with Even.” Isak look at the table. “In some countries in the world, what you are doing right now would be something admirable, but Norway is not one of those countries. It’s kind of hard to fight for someone behind closed doors here. Especially since your fighting a girl.”

“He’s got a point.” Noora commented. “Besides Even doesn’t strike me as the guy who is ashamed of what he feels.”

“He’s not.” Isak knew that much. Even was confident. He said he had been scared, but unlike him Even faced his fears and laughed at them, Isak just pretended they didn’t exist and would push them far from his mind. “So, how do I become proud?”

Eskild smiled. “By accepting who and what you are.”

“I know what I am.”

“Then say it. Have you ever even said it out loud?” Eskild questioned.

Say it out loud? Could he? Could he say it? He didn’t think saying it would suddenly make him proud. Sonja had nothing to say, nobody would judge her, she had nothing to be ashamed off. The whole world was on her side, where as Isak had so much working against him, but if he was going to fail he didn’t want it to be because he couldn’t even say three simple words to people who already knew. He took a deep breath after he noticed he was trembling a bit, but ever so softly said, “I’m gay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that's the end of our 8 days fanfiction. Tomorrow we find out what the real course of the week will be.   
> Thank you so much for your kudos, your comments and for going on this journey with me. I hope you have all enjoyed it very much. 
> 
> Much Love,


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